I'm sure you know by now...

...that if I'm absent from here, it means there is something or things unusual going on in my life.

This latest little hiatus is no exception.

I am turning a new leaf!

Cleaning out my closet big time. After three years of staying home, I am finally liquidating a lot of my professional wardrobe. It has freed up so much space for, ya know, the real clothes I wear on a daily basis to actually have a place in my closet and I just feel so much more settled. All of this in effort to actually put more effort into myself each day and the image I am presenting to my kids and those I come in contact with... on the rare occasion I actually leave the house. Ha!

Seriously though, I am just a little sick of wearing grungy sweats and looking dumpy ALL the time. It's bad enough that I drive the sweat pants of the automotive industry right? I should at least step out of the minivan looking surprisingly hip and cute!

I went shopping too! Got some great spring looks... will debut them here maybe if I can get my act together enough to remember to take a quick picture in the morning :)

***

I am potty training Nolan! He is 20 months and at a very good age for being malleable and compliant. So far so good! This week is all about introduction. He is being introduced to his underwear, sitting on the toilet, feeling wet, and learning to say all the necessary words out loud. He is doing well enough that I actually took him out to dinner at a restaurant wearing his little underwear instead of a diaper. He doesn't want to pee in them and seems to get that they are not going to keep him dry and comfy like a diaper. I would LOVE to have him toilet trained by the end of the Summer -- we'll see.

***

Working out twice per week at the gym and twice at home. Trying really hard to limit portions and knock out these last few pounds of pregnancy weight. I'm sure I'll get pregnant again right when I accomplish that :) That would be just fine!

***

Man, two days in Vegas takes a toll! I am STILL recovering from my sunburn, it is now a rashy mess... gotta love how I "tan." I have healing blisters on my feet and it was a slight set back to work off the calories from all that beer and fancy martinis. At least the tattoo is finally healed. Oh yeah, need to post a picture of that too!

Until tomorrow...

OUT TAKES

I took Warren out for a little impromptu portrait session this evening.

He did pretty well, and I think I may use the best ones for his 7 year old birthday mailer... so here are some that didn't make the cut:
[it is still crazy to me that I have a child that reads chapter books]

[he has THE most sensitive eyes to sunlight, poor kid can barely keep them open even with overcast, makes it hard to capture his beautiful blues]

[feeling more comfortable in the woods than posing on a chair, oh well...]

I am SO tired, don't know why I'm still awake right now. Oh yes, maybe it has something to do with the laffy taffy I ate after dinner. Mmmm sugar :)

Anyhow, I cannot wait to compile "The Warren Report" this year! There are so many things to record... what a year it has been for him. Can't believe he is turning 7 in just a few months...

Busy in a Good Way

Like counting my blessings in this beautiful life.

And playing "bank" with Warren in his huge fort in the loft.

And happily scheduling a few upcoming portrait sessions and excited to put more effort again into that little endeavor.

And watching as our Summer slowly fills up with trips and plans and projects.

And checking things off my to do list nearly as fast as I can write them down - the Spring weather has energized me and things are getting done!

Planning to take Warren out for his 7 year old portrait session this evening. He won't be 7 until June but he just got a haircut yesterday and I am feeling lucky :)

Las Vegas 2011

We've had a lot of good weekend trips over the years.
But this past weekend in Vegas trumps them all in my opinion.
(I'm sure Bryan would agree.)

We jam packed every minute with activity and conversation and lots of kisses, since it came out of one of our many conversations that kissing often goes by the way side in marriage and neither of us like that. Yep, give us each a couple of cocktails and the conversations get super meaningful and deep, ha! :)

We flew out of Denver very (very very) early Friday morning. We were immediately greeted with perfect 70+ degree weather and walked past so many water fountains and falls like these that they almost became commonplace in my peripheral vision.

I had decided a couple days prior to this trip that I was going to finally get a small, tasteful (if there is such a thing) tattoo of something meaningful while in Vegas. It made sense, we got married there - it is where we started this journey, that has now led to three little sons.

We found a really classy joint:

I nearly chickened out a hundred times, but did go through with it and got three little suns on my inner left wrist in white and light yellow ink. It hurt. A lot.

I realize I am leaving this post hanging by not publishing a picture of it just yet, but it is not ready to be photographed yet, I promise once it is all healed I will.

We did a tiny bit of shopping...

[got the most adorably sexy new skirt]

...and then ate lunch at Burger Bar (of course), where I had a delicious Bloody Mary and said "cheers" for the first time of the trip:

...and then ate the most fantastic dinner at "The Range" (I love scallops!) and then went to see "O" to wrap up our first day in Vegas.

It was a long fun day.

Saturday we slept in! All the way til about 8:30 - whoohoo! Then we went down to the cardio room at our hotel and worked out for a bit. We had coffee and then went to the pool for several hours. It was really hot out, much more so than I had anticipated. I am still nursing my sunburn (when will I learn), but the time just rushed by when the "drink guy" kept bringing me Bloody Marys. Time seemed to stand still... and I didn't even have to tip him!

Once we got ourselves pulled together and showered for the day, we walked around and bought the kids some fun souvenirs from the M&M store.

I couldn't resist this photo op:

...before riding the roller coaster at NY, NY with my eyes open for the first time ever on a roller coaster. It was a blast!

I can't leave out how utterly unimpressed Bryan was with the high end shops on the strip. Here he is swigging his beer outside of Luis Vuitton, right after he actually asked where the clearance rack was at Gucci. It was funny.

We wrapped up Saturday with dinner at a restaurant at our hotel (Mandalay Bay) and hanging out at House of Blues, listening to live local bands and drinking some cold beer.

Slept in again and hit the gym again on Sunday.

Then I tried a Bento Box for lunch (was thinking a lot about Japan and the people who's language I studied for 6 years). It was a fun concept!

Then it was time for me to head to the airport and Bryan to head to his conference at another hotel, where he'll be until later this week.

Bryan must have been really having withdrawals from not gambling in Vegas while I was there, because I had barely gotten out of my taxi at the airport when he sent me these two pictures:

I think he is incredibly lucky at these things, but as he'll tell you, you have to actually play to get lucky.

At any rate, I left feeling just as lucky for the intimate, fun weekend with just us.

Dinosaur Dioramas

Dinosaur Club is over. It actually finished last week, but I am behind here.

I am busy assimilating back into reality from an epic weekend in Vegas.
More to come on that!
***
Anyhow, back to my point; I don't get too much positive feedback in this line of work, staying home with my brood of boys. Sure, they tell me frequently how much they love me and that I'm "the best mom ever" and I sometimes beam with pride at their school work as if it were my very own. And of course Bryan tells me almost daily that I am a great mom, but that's kinda like your mom telling you how pretty you look on the first awkward day of Junior High, right? {wink!}

So I totally soaked up the kids and parents thanking me and praising me for my creativity and energy in doing these after school clubs. I know that when I do something, I do it well. It felt good to have that recognized by others. Sometimes I miss that feeling from working outside the home.

But what felt even better is seeing Warren and Jack's finished dioramas and how proud they are of them. Watching them play with their little dinosaurs, setting up scenes, and carefully closing the lids to carry them home.

[see how proud he looks with his?... that's how I feel too!]

It's all very worth it! And I may just be able to be talked into a Geology Club next year ;)

Chemical Engineer turned Domestic Engineer

I never saw it coming.  Never once had entertained the idea in my childhood or early adulthood that I would not work, not pursue a career, or *gasp* write "housewife" under occupation on a form. 

I usually shake my head and laugh when I explain to people that I spent 6 tortuous years in college earning a bachelors and masters degree in Chemical Engineering. 

Why Engineering? Is your father an Engineer?

I have no Earthly idea, no my father is not an Engineer.  My best answer is that my track coach was also my A.P. Chemistry teacher and he told me Chemical Engineering was the hardest undergraduate degree and that there weren't many women in Engineering. And he even pointed me to an Engineering school in Colorado where I could run Division II track most likely with a scholarship. 

Off I went.

That was 14 years ago. 

I wouldn't change a thing.  I am proud of my degrees and I'm sure that my studies have made me better at working through stress, critical thinking, multitasking, and problem solving - all of which are valuable to my current "job." 

But sometimes, just sometimes, I wish that someone along the way had at least even made the tiniest mention of the possibility of being a Domestic Engineer.  Maybe then it wouldn't have felt like such a colossal leap into crazy-ville like it did 4 years ago. 

Don't get me wrong, it's great this world we live in today where women have every opportunity as men and there is far less sexism and type-casting than there probably ever has been.  But really, it does make it hard for the modern woman/stay-at-home-mom to rectify what she has believed success to be and look like for 27 years, with what she now knows success truly is for her.

(See Disclaimer now at the bottom of this post if your blood pressure just spiked.)

A happy home.
The size of family you want, not what is dictated by the dual income lifestyle.
The satisfaction of making hard sacrifices to make "it" work.
The single income lifestyle isn't all that easy these days.
I get that.
I know I am lucky to even have the chance at all do make this choice.


Success is different for us all.
Staying home all day with three little testosterone factory tyrants isn't for everyone.
But sometimes when I glance over at my diplomas hanging on the wall I mostly feel like what I truly got at that school was an awesome husband and Father to my children.
It is antiquated, I know.
And it's certainly not what I went looking for, but I wouldn't change a thing.
***
Disclaimer:
***
I DO NOT think staying at home is harder, better, produces better kids, etc than any other option.  I worked and my kids went to daycare for 5 years.  I will most likely return to work someday.  I am not preachy, just a momma who is blissfully happy to have these years at home with her kids. 

And now I've seen it all...

{A honey bear purchased two days ago and already halfway gone. Nolan carries it around giving it kisses. Jack takes shots straight out of the bottle. Warren is the most civilized thus far, taking a little homemade corn bread with his honey.}

{Lego and Harry Potter have collided into the most disturbing result, in my humble opinion. It takes a lot to make me gasp at anything caught standing on my counter top and this little creature did the trick!}

{Finally tested negative today. I would have been out of the first trimester by now, and instead I am rejoicing that the pregnancy hormone is now out of my system. I still feel terrible disappointment some days over it, but I am at least happy to be able to say I had a miscarriage, instead of I am having a miscarriage. Time heals all. And so does an upcoming weekend away with just my Man. Can't wait!}

Spoiled Much?

The good news is... they don't know they are spoiled since they have nothing to compare to right?

Going to our local ice cream parlor is one of our favorite family treats!

We avoid artificial food colors all week in order to afford ourselves something totally, unabashedly, unnaturally, obnoxiously... BLUE! :)
[Could Nolan's eyes and mouth open any wider?]

["'sup, Mom?"]

["just gonna set this bad boy down and take a break for a sec."]

["before changing it up and going for the bottom up approach."]

["it's messier and I get to eat the cone first, perfect!"]

...all in moderation...

Plus, Jack totally went for purple this week anyhow :)

On Today's Agenda:

• Setting out Easter decorations plenty early since I totally missed the Valentine's Day decorations this year on account of what a crummy month February ended up being.
• Nursing a cold with tea and honey, vitamin C, and some rest.

{Actually gonna burn this pretty egg candle this year!}

•  Running to Whole Foods with just Nolan, who proudly pushed the little cart the whole time and was so obedient with what he put in the cart and where he went, making for the perfect Project 365 moment for today!
  
  
  
  
  
  
•  Making steak fajitas for dinner tonight. Mmmmm....
•  Enjoying a snack of Ezekiel Cinnamon Raisin toast with lots of butter
•  Thinking I talk about food way too much :)
  
  


This Boy...

...has an infectious smile,

...and a fashion sense all his own.

...is almost always shadowed by his baby brother, who idolizes him.

...just started on a new book series adventure "Flat Stanley." We are reading a chapter per day together and working on lots of comprehension/discussion questions.

I love this boy!

This or That

I don't know what's making me more happy today,

this pair of new patent leather ballet flats

paired with a comfy pair of practical jeans hemmed for flats,

or that reflection in my super-shiny counter top

 (from yesterday's spring cleaning frenzy)

of my favorite retro canisters from a thrift store in San Angelo, TX.

Or maybe I'm happy for the weekend.

Making a conscious effort to let the frustrations of the week stay behind me,

and actually hoping it does snow for once.

Sweet Jack Dylan

Jack, you've been on my mind a lot lately.

Even more than usual.

This sixth year of your life is bringing forth so much personality and sweet humor,

I can't help but take notice.

Your Daddy and I are constantly exchanging knowing glances of

"did you just see that?"

or

"can you believe how sweet this kid is?"

You love coffee already.

You rise early and say Good Morning to anyone in your path.

You have a real talent for building with Legos.

It is a passion of yours and we are so impressed (seriously!)

with the perfectly symmetric little things you are constantly constructing.

You are such a chatterbox!

You are so affectionate.

You love your family and tell us all each day

how happy and lucky you are to have us as your family.

You are such a perfect blend of rugged little boy and earth-angel

that I sometimes don't feel worthy of being your Momma.

I will relish watching you grow up and I hope and pray you don't move far from home.

Stay sweet, little man.

Your family loves you so much!

We are the lucky ones.

Potpourri - "Amazed"

I am amazed at the spelling words 1st graders have these days. And even more amazed that Warren always knows them the day he gets his new list.

I am amazed to think that someday not too far away, I will leave all three of these boys at the Elementary school in the morning.

...hopefully I have another baby by then though...

Amazingly, this was the page I opened to in a random magazine on the treadmill this morning. I knew it! But going to the gym inspires me to eat better and drink more water, cleaning my house... not so much!

It never ceases to amaze me how one minute these two are duking it out in a fit of sibling rivalry and the next minute sitting side by side like best buddies.

A few randoms too:

• Booking Warren's solo trip to Alaska in June.  He is going for two weeks on his own, embarking on Wilderness Survival and Whales Tails and Salmon Camp, camping, fishing, and being without his brothers.  He is going to grow up so much visiting "Alaska Grandma" all by himself.  I am so excited for him and am sure he'll be a foot taller when he returns.
• Jack will be doing Lego Engineering Camp here at the rec center while Warren is gone.  Then they will both be doing T-ball after that.  I have all their Summer Kindergarten and 2nd grade prep workbooks stacked neatly already too.  I was excited to get all prepared for this Summer early since I was so sure I'd have a newborn.  I am still going to get to reap the benefits of being prepared though and who knows, maybe I'll be hugely pregnant by then! 
• Today's Project 365 picture made me stop and think about how my boys view the roles of men and women and all kinds of thoughts got stirred up in me.  I want to raise good men!  But that can sometimes feel like a moving target in society... ya know?

Project 365 Out Take

Since a couple people asked, you should see a link that says "Project 365" right under the main header picture on this blog. It is in a newly added Link Bar, which also has links "About Me", "Mamarazzi Portraits", etc. Let me know if you still have problems with it. I am not crazy about the template I am using for my Project 365 and will probably change it soon; it displays vertical pictures all smashed on the home page for some reason.

Here is another link as well: http://charity-project365.blogspot.com/

Anyhow, Nolan LOVES water fountains. And there just so happens to be TWO, RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER at the Elementary school. Sometimes he snuggles right in between them and just radiates happiness to be in such close proximity to water fountain awesomeness. To my knowledge he doesn't even know what they do or are for. But all that reflective metal and buttons is all he needs to see to be smitten!

Head over to project 365 to see my favorite one of Nolan and the water fountains. He had just seen a "big kid" go up and use the water fountain, so he was doing his best to emulate that behavior. Cute!

I took these pictures with my iPhone and showed them to Bryan first and he said "I'm impressed, I would never think those were done with a camera phone."  I can see a lot of noise, but I didn't want the flash on to reflect off the metal and ruin the picture.  I love the brick!  And his little forced expression of "sadness" with the bottom lip :)

My thinking with Project 365 is not to get "perfect", focused, well-lit pictures, but rather to capture some emotion or something in my house or life that is meaningful to me.  I want to make a picture book at the end of the year full of images that will be fun to look through and tell a story without any words!  Fun!

I actually ran!

Went to the gym today and I actually ran for 15 minutes.  Had a good laugh over the threatening/encouraging/(wtf?) sign in the locker room that read:

"What fits better into your busy schedule, exercising 1 hour per day or being dead 24 hours per day?"

Yup!  Just the motivation I needed right? :) My plan is to go at least twice per week and still do my elliptical machine at home a couple times too. When I go to the gym, I want to to 20 min of cardio and then do some weight lifting upper or lower body. Today was upper body. I am out of shape. Moving on!

Nolan went to the childcare room at the gym!  This is going to be a regular outing for us nowadays!

Project 365 is underway complete with a link under the header of this blog.  It is already providing me with motivation to take more pictures and gain practice with execution and editing.  Yay! 

I have already found myself looking at very ordinary things in my house and life and thinking "what interesting angle could I capture that with?"  Love it!

Today's inspiration happened as I was standing over a very empty sink with only a scone left from breakfast and our very outdated globe serving in the place of the normally highly cluttered sink and counter.  It needed to be captured! 

So head over and check out the final image! And maybe start your own Project 365! I am convinced that there is a hobbyist photographer in all of us.