Life in bullets.

• Taking ever so tiny steps towards making my litte hobby more legit.  I love portrait photography! 

Specifically, my clients now recieve a fancy letter giving them permission to print their pictures, since this issue had come up several times. Also, working on designing a water mark that will be added to digitally displayed versions of my work. And I have taken steps to streamline my editing and the process of sharing the final results with my clients. I have more than enough saved for the Canon 5D Mark III... when are they gonna release it??? So ready!

• Went ahead and put my Fall wreath on the door and lit a pumpkin spice candle.  Fall is almost here, I can feel it.  Hooray!!  Can't you see the change with the glowy Fall sunlight?  Love!
• Went to the airshow with the family on Sunday at our nearby airport (where we own a commercial building), so we got to watch from a different vantage point than the general public and enjoy air conditioning breaks too.

B2 Stealth bomber

F16 fighter jet

Then we continued the party (for Grandpa John's birthday) at our very nearby Quaker Steak and Lube, where Nolan proceeded to climb out of his highchair and fall asleep on the floor under it. Okay then!

• I managed to lose a couple pounds just in the first week of school, just due to walking back and forth to the school and having a regular eating schedule again.  I want to lose 8 more to be back to my normal 110#.  Maybe that will help my body get back to normal and not have such a hard time getting pregnant.  Worth a try! 
• Speaking of the first week of school, I had become so used to the grueling pace of the Summer with all three boys ALL DAY that I was...bored...at certain points of the week.  Even ordered Jack's 6 year old birthday mailer (his birthday is in December!) and have been cleaning and organizing my home to no end. 
• Not too much else.  I continue to watch a couple of neighbor girls and be active in PTA, so far it is not too much.  We had not one but TWO water balloon fights today, since it was a modified contact day at school.  I have to admit to thoroughly enjoying them both and totally perfecting my technique with filling them up!

Peace out, beautiful people of the blogosphere :)

Back at it.

This morning I cracked the eggs right down the drain and put the shells in the bowl. Did it to four eggs before I even caught on. That's the kind of spastic energy I had going on. Lunch had been packed since yesterday afternoon, haircuts done in the evening, and even a quick trip to Walgreens to get Warren some Axe deodorant that he requested. So, I don't know why I was so anxious - other than having to run to get 5 dozen donuts on the way to school for the "boo hoo breakfast" for Kindergarten parents.

But I did nonetheless manage to operate my camera well enough to get a few pictures of the morning's activities.

{Bro's for Life!  These two are in school together now, the beginning of a legacy of "Lawson Boys" I'm sure.  Look out world!}

{The future is lookin' bright (and cute!)  Don't worry this one is for sure getting printed and framed.}

{Can't believe Jack is a Kindergartener!}

{Finally time to line up -- Warren with one of his bestest buddies, totally not into having his picture taken anymore, can't blame him.}

{They even obliged and posed for a quick picture for me.  Awww, such a high school graduation slide show moment, no?}

{Jack and his best buddy found their seats right away in their classroom, as if there was any doubt!}

Another thing I want to record here is the neighborhood function/party we hosted yesterday.  While I don't have any real pictures (except for this one of our finished shirts hanging to dry):

We had a blast!  We made homemade crepes with whipped cream and berries and ham and cheese and everyone tie dyed Broncos shirts.  We have some creative and awesome neighbors.  Need to make this an annual tradition!

"Das a Cooo Tree, Mama."

Oh how Nolan's personality shines. He is a raging show-off. A snuggly blankie boy. A lover of motor-cycles. A plasma car maniac. A big brother fan for life. A string cheese addict. A man of few words...

But when he does speak, it's generally to tell me that something he spies is "Cooo" (Cool.)

That's a cool bike.
That's a cool motorcycle.
That's a cool truck.
That's a cool gun.

At football practice, he's all about the cool trees. They run to the totem poles, tipping their heads back as far as they go to try and see the tops.

They circle around them and eventually run back to "home base" for a snack or a hug or a quick snuggle on Daddy's lap.

All the while, there's absolute magic going on to the field to our right of the cool trees. I can't help myself. I say things like "he's a natural," "look at him go," "mark my words, the kid's got talent."

Yeah... I know. Probably why Nolan hasn't ever muttered "Coo Mama" yet and probably never will.

Be still my heart.

Just to keep the pendulum in full swing, today we are checking off those last few items from our Summer to do list.

First up, take these three jammied darlings to iHop for breakfast bright and early, per their request many times this Summer. This time when they all came into my room this morning to rouse me and asked again I said simply "yes." They squealed and ran downstairs and helped each other get shoes on and even stopped to pose for a picture. I love how Warren is trying to put his arms around his brothers.. that is so him.

Anyhow, lots of bacon was had by all and they had "coffee" like Mama, and I'm all around pretty sure this will be a long term memory for them, at least the big boys.

And then since returning, Warren has been wearing his football gear off and on (more on) - he love football so much! I think we are really onto something! Jack and Nolan love going to his practices, where they play on the expanses of grass and trails with the "cool trees" (more on that later!) with all the other little siblings. It is a sight to see! There is a real sense of camaraderie among the parents and the kiddos. We are all loving it!

We were even able to go grocery shopping and pick up supplies for the "party" we are hosting this weekend with our neighborhood. Making crepes and tie dying Bronco's shirts! Yep! It is random and for sure messy and totally memorable too. 'Cause we're all about making memories around here :)

Still here.

I have been taking lots of pictures:

{Pictures of Family}

{Pictures of beautiful children}

Taking this man-child to his first official football practice (Go Outlaws!!):

Still doing lots of Summer learning:

Soaking in some last favorite Summer outings:

And appropriately drinking coke zero from Chic Fil A out of a crazy straw, cause that's how I roll at the end of the Summer:

Seriously though, I think I hit some sort of wall recently. So ready for cooler weather. So ready for school. So ready for a sense of structure and schedule to shake out of all this craziness lately.

a few favorites...

...from yesterday's photo session with this sweet {nearly two year old} girl.

We have a busy busy weekend ahead so signing off for now!

Obsessed With...

Because, no, I don't just sit around pining for a baby - although I did have a dream last night that I actually had miscounted and did in fact already have four, not three, children. Presto! We were in fact done. It was funny. Funny in my dream and still funny when I woke up.

Anyhow, I am totally obsessed with our family desk calendar. I get all excited when it is a new month and I tear off the old coffee stained, scribbled, marked-off-days month and reveal the clean new potential. It usually fills up within a few days, and sometimes I get crazy with the highlighters.

Also, you may have noticed my new obsession with twitpic in my twitter feed {on the right hand side lower down on this blog}! So fun. Love it. My new favorite way to over-share my life's little things :) Enjoy...

Lastly, definitely not a new obsession, but still burning strong is thrifting. Went yesterday and found {among other things} this adorable, awesome, super functional booster seat. Was needing one for the baby I watch and this more than fits the bill. It was less than $2 and doesn't have a mark or tear on it!

Speaking of the girls I watch, I am so smitten with the whole thing - borderline obsessed. My boys LOVE the girls and are so happy on the days I tell them they are coming over. They are protective of them and play so well with them. That bond really, really gets to me. Why? Because our kids do not have cousins (and that is not going to change anytime soon). They are not growing up like Bryan and I did surrounded by oodles of cousins (my mom has four sisters and Bryan's mom has five brothers and sisters). It is sad to me, but I am doing my best to make up for it with our "neighbor cousins."

There you have it, the other things I am obsessing over lately!

413 Days

That's roughly (to the best of my quick calculation) how long it's been since we set out to complete our family. That's a lot of days of hoping, wishing, *ahem* trying, wondering, waiting, and ultimately being disappointed over and over.


I did put a call in to my Doctor last month and he assured me that I am well within "normal" range of time it can take, especially since we did actually conceive in December after about 6 months of trying (we all know how that ultimately ended in early March). I just have so many questions.


Why was it so easy the last three times?
What has changed?
Is it because I nursed Nolan for so long?
Am I just getting old?
Are we doing something wrong/different?
Trying too hard?
Is it ALL IN MY HEAD??


Like with everything, I have read up. And reached out. And come to know so much more about infertility through talking to other people, reading articles, and even a couple of blogs.


Mostly, people talk about the hurt and heartache of not being able to start a family. For us, the frustration is in not being able to finish ours. And as far as I can tell the hurt is not diminished.


Each month is a punch in the gut. Time doesn't slow down or forgive you. The boys are getting older and older and I can't help but wonder what is a too large of an age gap from oldest to youngest.. is there such a thing? Would I let that mindset dictate my family size? More questions...


And there are no answers to any of them.

"What's for lunch?"

This question is oft asked/wined/shouted around here seemingly 15 seconds after I finish cleaning up breakfast. Sometimes, I actually have an answer, like today.

Today is a "home day" for us. No outside responsibilities and my to do list looks like this: vacuum (check), check PTA email and voicemail (check), look at Rec Center catalogue for Fall extracurriculars for Nolan and Jack (check), return books to the library, get Warren enormous water bottle for football.

So, obviously we will have to venture out of the house here shortly for the last two items. But for now, the house still smells like the homemade flax and buttermilk waffles from breakfast, happily intertwined with lunch.

Lunch:

{blueberries, broccoli, and chicken breasts}

"Swiper, no swiping!"

Simple and good.

We call him a brocco-vore!

"Way to go Mom!"

"Muwaaah!"

You gotta celebrate what's good, 'cause who knows I might just serve Popsicles for lunch tomorrow!

What I took away from the 1st real football practice.

• Don't read too much into the position group your kid is placed in at first (for Warren it was Running Back), because 20 minutes later they could very well be doing Wide Receiver drills.  My iPhone got a work out reading about all things football related on Wikipedia.
• Bleachers+Toddler=a nervous wreck Mama who is much better off sitting in the grass while brothers run up and down a grassy knoll for over an hour.

• There is no such thing as a too big water bottle for a two hour football practice.  Warren was NOT happy with me that his ran out so soon.  His best buddy on the team has an ENORMOUS thermos style jug of water that Warren is coveting.  Will be a potential wild goose chase today to find one for tonight's practice.
• It is a life-changer, this organized sport thing.  We ran to Wendy's after practice and didn't even get home until 9.  Ummm, kids are usually ASLEEP before that and they all were sweaty and grassy and in dire need of a bath.  I tucked the last munchkin in (again!) at 10:30.  This is going to take some getting used to.
• Two kids just only now woke up at 8:30 and one is STILL sleeping as I type.  So, at least a staggered more leisurely morning stands in contrast to bedtime routine last night.
•  In the course of 2 hours you can experience welling pride for your little blossoming athlete as well as dismal frustration watching them goof around and not pay attention at times.  All normal newly 7 year old first team/organized sport behavior I presume!
• Bring your telephoto lens and real camera!  Cell phones cannot capture anything worthwhile when there are 40+ kids out on a huge field running around.

{Warren is somewhere out there on the field, oh and there's a football in the air!}

• It is actually fun to see the High School your kids will attend (GO GATORS!!), and come away feeling renewed sense of pride in humanity as it is a large group of the high school football players that are helping to coach this three day Player's Camp.  They are patient funny kids and obviously determined athletes.  Just the way I hope to see my guys in 10 years!
• Don't take it personal when at dinner afterwards you ask your son "tell me one thing about football that you don't think I know," and he replies "the ball is shaped like a foot, Mom."  Okay, thanks buddy... give me a little credit here :)

Kindergarten bound!

School starts in THREE weeks!  What?!  I already mentioned that?!  Well, whatever, I am stoked that we are wrapping up another Summer (this is my third with three!) and avoided ANY trips to the E.R. and managed to stay off of the local news :) .  Those are always my top two goals of the Summer.

It has been a long fun Summer jam-packed with tons of outings and activities and LOTS of at home learning.  I seriously kicked @ss this Summer on that front.  Their binders are stuffed full of "reports" workbook sheets and, for Jack at least, lots of letter practice sheets. 

When he finished up the one this morning, I about burst at the seams with pride.  He has come SO far this Summer.  Holding his pencil correctly, forming the letters with a steady hand and in the correct fashion.  I can't believe how GOOD he is doing compared to this same sheet a few months ago.  He is a HARD dilligent worker and he is gonna rock the house in Kindergarten. 

He got to meet his teacher last Friday, since she was at Jumpin' Jordy's with her son too.  He was a bit bashful when she was introducing herself, and he later confided in me that he "loves Miss Tina and Betty from preschool the best, Mommy."  I assured him he will love his new teacher too - she is fantastic and one of his best friends, Paul, is for sure in his morning Kindergarten class.